Tuesday, June 23, 2009


I am today (my Yoda impression for the day). Well, still irritated from yesterday in point of fact.

I was sent a picture. Of my ex-husband. It has me a little muddled, to say the least. I'm not sure why though. My feelings about it and my ex are varied right now.

I think that I'm mostly relieved. Relieved because I'm not still married to the jerk. On a much shallower level, I'm relieved because my ex looks closer to 60 than the 45 he is now. His hair is white. WHITE!!!! Yeah, ok. I'm no spring chicken, but most people consistently mistake me for being in my early to mid 20's. So sure that makes me feel good. I got CARDED the last time I went to the liquor store, so that's something.

So, what bothers me about this picture.... it contains my ex and his girlfriend and her two sons. Hrmmmm. See, he can't have children of his own. He refused to even consider adoption because he said he could not see himself raising "another man's" kids. Ok, fine. AI then? Nope. He wanted them to be HIS children. Well gee buddy, that ain't gonna happen with no live swimmers, now is it?

So, in this picture is a man who now looks old enough to be my father and his girlfriend (who is at least my size - which is to say a little on the not-so-skinny side). He said he'd never ever date another "large" woman again. Huh. All men seem to have this absurd notion about women they'd date or marry but reality bites them in the ass most days when it comes to not what they'd accept (they being men), but what woman will accept them.

I'm pretty thankful that I'm married to C~ and not my ex. C~ is wonderful. He's good to me AND good for me. My ex probably thinks I should be killed mercilessly and cut into a zillion pieces for gator bait. Then again, his opinion of me was never all that high to begin with.

Now I can add glad, thankfull, and happy that I'm not still in that place.